As parents, our single goal in raising children is to deliver them into adulthood happy, healthy, and thriving. We want to think that our children will bounce through the years of their childhood and adolescence unscathed from harm and hurt.
Book Review: “My Body Is Special”
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[…] Please, please get comfortable talking to your kids about their bodies, private parts, and sex. You might need to get honest with yourself and move past some issues you may have in order to have […]
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[…] Your body belongs to you, no one may touch it in a way that upsets you or hurts you. You own the right to demand people […]
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[…] Please, please get comfortable talking to your kids about their bodies, private parts, and sex. You might need to get honest with yourself and move past some issues you may have in order to have […]
I love books like this. Have you seen The Safe Side DVD? {I’m sure you have.} I love it and we have watched it several times. I’ve also been going over this with my daughter since she was very young and I talk with my son about it too. I know that at some point I have to let her out of the house to be with friends. At that time I have to trust what I’ve taught her.
Child sex play, including mutual touching, is a normal, important part of growing up.
Rather than helping children love their bodies, teaching them it is wrong to touch or look at other people’s “private parts” or allow others to touch or look at theirs actually makes them feel bodies, theirs and others, are dirty.
Keeping children safe should not mean killing their sexuality or their bodily pleasures.
Judith –
I hear what you are saying, and I respect your statment and your expertise. At the same time I think you are changing the context of the message from the book and post. This book does not teach children that any part of their body is “dirty”, nor does it kill sexuality. Sexuality is a beautiful, wonderful thing and when developed naturally, allows our children to thrive as human beings. We want that. Sexual abuse, however, does not. Empowering our children to have a respect for their bodies and developing a voice when their intuition tells them something is amiss is all part of healthy sexuality.
As a mom, I am not comfortable with the idea of mutual touching during child sex play, however normal you say it is. My gut check tells me otherwise. Does it and can it happen? You bet. Now a days, with intense hypersexualization of childhood, is it more than the simple “I’ll show you mine if you show me yours?” You bet. And that’s why I want to give my daughter and my son a framework and point of reference to work from should this come up when they are at play. It is not about shaming or embarassing our children, not at all. It is about teaching our children a respect for their bodies and establishing healthy boundaries for themselves.
Sorry, just saw the link to the book you suggested!