Every morning I try to fix my hair or put on a touch of makeup to pull my overtired face together (I average four hours of sleep a night) before heading out with the kids. Usually only one happens, this morning was washed and styled hair but no time for makeup.
As I was dropping my daughter off at her summer school class, one of her little friends approached me to say hello and get a hug. When she pulled back she said, “You look different today. You don’t look normal.”
I asked her what was different, and she said that I didn’t have any makeup on. I laughed and said that she had seen me without makeup on before. I said that this was my normal face, that I add the makeup but my natural face is normal. I asked her which face she liked better, and she said they were both okay. She wasn’t trying to be rude, she was being honest with her observations in that authentic way only young children can be.
I smiled and told her to go play and have a good day, but her comment made me wonder…..She is right, both my natural face and my face wearing makeup are okay. I like the way I look either way. But how much do our kids, especially our daughters, expect women to cover and alter our natural faces each day?
I like makeup and don’t think it is inherently evil, but do we know and understand why we use it? Do our kids? And can we go out in public without it? If we do go out in public without makeup, is that really being ‘brave’? When we say it is being brave, are we reducing the experience of being a woman to how she does or does not accept society’s expectations of her to be pretty? But maybe in today’s image-obsessed world being authentic with our actual selves/looks is being brave, most especially for women. I welcome your thoughts on this.
Some women never wear makeup, some wear it for fun, some wear it out of habit or ritual, and some wear it as a mask. Whatever our reasons, they seem to come into sharper focus when we have to explain our actions to our inquisitive children. You do not have to defend any of your choices to me, or anyone, but I would love for you to consider the questions above and feel free to share any answers or thoughts!